April 3, 2011
Have YOU ever seen a llama kiss a llama on the llama?
Please don’t curse me when you can’t get this song out of your head, and please don’t throw yourself off the balcony when the bizarre imagery from the video invades your sweet slumber.
Be forewarned: I can’t seem to make the video stop once it starts. Enjoy!Vodpod videos no longer available.
February 11, 2011
I was cooking dinner this evening, and my phone buzzed–I’d received a text message. No big deal, I thought. I’m sure it’s my gym partner C, squaring away plans for tomorrow’s workout. I got my veggies into the oven, and checked the message. To my surprise, I found this message from an unknown number:
It was from a local number. I showed it to Fernando, thinking that someone had sent him a message to my phone by mistake. After all, I didn’t think anyone I knew would call me “broski.” He checked the number and said he didn’t have the person in his contacts, either.
It seemed doubtful that a friend of ours had changed their number, but I couldn’t be sure. So I responded, in a most non-committal manner:
Not much, who’s asking?
In no time, a response:
Haha dis is kayla………. >< ___
Trouble is, I don’t know anyone named Kayla. I was sure this was some teenager texting the wrong number. I double-checked with F that he didn’t know any Kayla, either, and decided to let the poor girl down gently:
Sorry, don’t know a Kayla-think u got the wrong #
Several minutes pass. I just figured that she thought, “Oh, crap!” before checking again and then texting the correct number, and that she was already in deep conversation with the recipient, telephonic misstep long forgotten.
Buzz. I look again.
Isn’t dis sean?!?!
Whoa. Now admittedly, she didn’t spell it right, but that mistake is surprisingly common. I was stumped – who on earth was Kayla? And how did she know me? Good thing Fernando had an idea, because I was more than a little troubled that someone would send me 9pm text messages with such abysmal spelling. Upon Fernando’s ever-wise counsel, I replied:
r u looking for a boy Sean or a girl Sean?
Kayla’s fast reply:
Whew! It WAS just a mistake after all! The Shawn-Sean coincidence was still creepy, but what the heck, stranger things have happened, right?
Relieved, I texted her back:
That’s funny, cuz my name is actually “Shawn” – but I’m a thirty-something lady! Think you got the wrong #, dear : )
If you think the most bizarre and head-scratching part of the the story is over, well, you’re wrong. Kayla replied:
Oh, srry. I seen this number On tv, sayin that call Or txt 2 get waka ticketss or somein and then my boy gave me dis number……..
December 8, 2010
Stumbled across this totally random video of hand supermodel Ellen Sirot from a couple of years ago. She’s crazy. Or a serial killer. Or a mastermind of planning serial killings, more likely, since she can’t actually use her hands. Is it just me, or is the entire interview just an extra-supersize serving of creepy?
July 8, 2010
I swear, if I could make up stuff like this, I’m sure I’d find a way to leverage it into being a gazillionnaire or something. I’d never heard of a “frontal wedgie” (AKA cameltoe) until today.
If you ladies want to avoid the shame of the dreaded “frontal wedgie,” you’re in luck! You can purchase the solution. In fact, you can purchase AT LEAST TWO KINDS of solutions! Behold ye Camelflage, and CamelAmmo…
Camelflage panties are described on their website like this: “These aren’t your ordinary panty, they were specifically designed to smooth out your feminine parts under tight clothing.” BONUS: They include a “Before and After” section on the site, including the most hideously-photoshopped “After” photo ever! The lady portrayed there is SO lady-like, it appears she’s suddenly wearing a skirt. Or something that isn’t pants.
The second product has evidently undergone a name change or makeover recently, as the URL http://www.CamelAmmo.com redirects immediately to a much more insipidly-named website, “Bye Bye Lines.” There, women everywhere are exhorted to put their “best front forward” and to bid “farewell to frontal wedgies.” BONUS: This product is doctor-endorsed!
Here’s the scoop from Dr. Gina Gora, MD, PLLC, ABFM: “Medical research has found that wearing tight pants that ride up in the front can contribute to the frequency of UTIs leading to bladder infections and yeast infections. By using Bye Bye Lines family of products women can reduce these occurrences while feeling confident about their appearance and health.”
I would have just recommended not buying your clothes quite so tight. Also, for my fellow grammar nerds, please note that I’ve quoted Dr. Gora exactly – see image below.
June 21, 2010
Ugh. And, having lived there, I’m 100% sure that this is a true message to the TV station. Most prevalent attitude I observed during the decades I lived there? “I’ve got mine, so screw you.” Comments from YouTube users were pretty funny…
June 17, 2010
June 17, 2010
I feel filthy even posting this–it has so much wrong with it that I don’t even know where to begin. But I do know it just makes me feel alternately sad and pissed. This could be the best toothpaste ever, but I’d never purchase it because of the company’s advertising. Ugh.